It’s graduation season! You finally did it! As you walk across the stage to receive your diploma, you feel a sense of pride and accomplishment wash over you. All the late nights, early mornings, and sacrifices have been worth it.
As you look out into the sea of faces, you see the proud smiles of your family and friends. They have been there for you through it all and now, they are here to celebrate this momentous occasion with you. They’re all so proud, so happy, and so excited for what your future holds.
And then: the dread. The inevitable fear of change. The sneaking suspicion that you’re going to let everybody down. The imposter syndrome. I mean, after all, all you did was write some papers and pass some tests. What do you know anyways?
I’ve graduated not once, not twice, not three times, but FOUR times (five if you count middle school. Do we count middle school?), and each time it has felt like this pivotal turning point in my life, like turning the page to the next chapter. I didn’t know what was on the other side. I was scared, sad, excited, anxious, and hopeful all at the same time.
Whether you’ve just graduated high school or college, or even earned your PhD, the burning question is the same…
what does my life look like now?
Graduation means saying goodbye to what your life has been for years. Whether it’s the city you live in, the friends you made, the part-time job you’ve been working, your entire family, your roommates, or even just your favorite teacher; graduation represents a loss, and the promise of a gain.
Maybe you got into your dream college, or you have an amazing job lined up. Maybe you don’t (I didn’t, btw). Even so, you’re left with a fancy piece of paper, and an idea of what might be, with nothing real to hold onto as everything around you shifts. It can be devastating.
Okay, not trying to be bleak. Maybe you’re really, really excited. Starry eyed at what the future is going to bring. You know you’re gonna do great things. Travel, move to that city you’ve always dreamed of, land your dream job, and get your first place all on your own. It is exciting!!!
However you’re feeling, I’ve been there (4-5 times!), and so I’m here to share with you what I wish I had known as I was flooded by all the feels on graduation day.
1. it won’t change all at once
After walking across the stage and receiving that coveted diploma, you may have felt like graduation day marked a definitive end to your education and a clear beginning to the next chapter in your life. However, the reality is often different. While the day itself may have been exciting and filled with celebration, the changes that graduation brings usually occur much more slowly over time.
For many recent graduates, it takes months or even years to adjust to post-grad life. Finding a job in your field can sometimes take longer than expected, and even when a job is secured, the transition from student to full-time employee can be challenging. It’s not uncommon for newly-minted graduates to feel overwhelmed or like they don’t quite fit in yet.
Even more so if you’re graduating high school and going off to college. The summer before the new fall semester might very-well feel like a limbo state.
Beyond work, friendships and social circles will shift too. School often offers a built-in community, but after graduation, people start moving away or pursuing different paths. It can be tough to maintain those close connections, particularly if you move to a new city or start a job that doesn’t offer much free time.
All of these changes can be difficult to navigate, and it’s important to remember that they won’t happen overnight. After graduation, it’s normal to feel a bit adrift or unsure of your place in the world. However, with time and effort, most graduates are able to successfully transition into their post-college lives. It might take some patience and perseverance, but eventually, the pieces start to fall into place.
2. success happens slowly
Whether you’re moving onto college or the workforce, plan for some bumps along the road.
It can be tough to not find a job right after graduation, and it may be easy for you to fall into a spiral of self-doubt and frustration. After spending years building up your skills and knowledge, not being able to find a job that utilizes them can feel like hitting a wall.
But don’t give up hope just yet. Remember that finding a job can take time, and it doesn’t mean you’re not good enough. Keep applying to jobs and networking with people in your field. Consider taking on freelance or part-time work to gain experience and build your portfolio.
In the meantime, focus on continuing to learn and grow your skills. Take online courses, attend workshops, or work on personal projects that showcase your abilities. And most importantly, take care of yourself. Job searching can be mentally and emotionally draining, so make sure to take breaks and practice self-care.
Likewise, if you’re starting college for the first time or going into grad school, you might find that your courses are much harder than you expected, and opportunities for friendships might be scarce from the get-go.
Just keep in mind that success happens slowly. It is a journey, not a destination. It is the result of consistent effort, adaptation, and a willingness to embrace failure. You’ll get there.
3. your first job (or few jobs) will probably suck
Working after college is often viewed as a new and exciting time to launch the career of your dreams. However, for many, their first job out of college can be a disappointing and demotivating experience. The reality is that most entry-level positions do not offer much room for creativity or growth.
As a recent graduate, you likely have high hopes for your career, but the truth is that your first job will probably suck. You may be given mundane tasks such as making copies or answering phones. You may find yourself doing tasks that have little relevance to your degree or field of study. And worst of all, you will probably realize that your paycheck won’t be enough to sustain your lifestyle.
It’s important to remember that this is a temporary stage. As you gain experience and build your skills, more challenging and fulfilling opportunities will come your way. Stick it out, learn as much as you can, and take advantage of any opportunity that comes your way. In the end, your first job out of college may not be the dream job you imagined, but it can still be a valuable stepping stone in your career.
4. you won’t keep all your friends
It’s natural to feel a sense of loss after graduation, especially when it comes to friendships. You’ve spent years building and nurturing these relationships, and now you’re faced with the reality that you might not see these people as often as you used to.
The truth is, it’s very likely that you’ll lose touch with some of your friends after graduation. People will move away, start new jobs, and get caught up in their own lives. It’s important to recognize that this doesn’t mean the end of your friendship, but rather a shift in the dynamic.
It’s up to you to make an effort to maintain these relationships. Set up regular phone or video calls, plan trips to visit each other, and make an effort to stay connected on social media. Remember that friendships take effort, and the more you put into them, the more you’ll get out of them.
But don’t be too hard on yourself if some friendships do fade away. It’s a natural part of life, and it doesn’t diminish the value of the memories you shared together. Cherish those memories, and look forward to the new friendships you’ll make in the future.
5. your journey won’t look like anyone else’s
In a world of social media influencers and happy, successful people being shoved down our throats constantly, it is so important to recognize that your journey is uniquely YOURS, and it won’t look like anyone else’s. You have your own path to follow, and it’s important to remember that comparing yourself to others will only hinder your progress. Embrace your individuality and take pride in paving your own way.
You may not have a clear direction yet, and that’s okay. Many people don’t have a set plan after graduation. You have the freedom to explore different opportunities and find what truly excites you. Don’t be afraid to take risks and try new things. Failure may happen along the way, but it’s part of the learning process and will ultimately lead you to where you’re meant to be.
Remember to take care of yourself throughout your journey. Don’t let the pressure of society’s expectations overwhelm you. Take time to reflect on what makes you happy and fulfilled. It’s okay if your path doesn’t fit the traditional mold- there’s no right or wrong way to achieve success.
my post-grad journey
By the time I graduated high school, I had already started college. My school did this awesome thing called concurrent enrollment which meant that my high school paid for me to attend some classes at the local community college. Being a first-generation college student with no money saved for college, I took advantage of this program my final semester of senior year.
This meant I missed out on all the senior year activities that my school did, including that really fun one where my high school boyfriend cheated on me. Yikes.
While all my friends were planning to move away to attend university, I stayed at the community college. And honestly, I felt like kind of a loser at the time (except now I have no student loans so no regrets here). It was really isolating to be staying in the same town, in my mom’s house, working at the local Walmart while all my friends planned their big life changes.
Fast forward two years, and I graduated community college. Finally, the “big life changes.” I decided to move about an hour away to the city to finish my bachelor’s degree, and I reluctantly got a new job, some random roommates, at a new school full of strangers. And man, it was lonely.
Big life change was not great for me, tbh. But I won’t go into that here. By the time graduation day rolled around, I had already secured an apartment on my own (college roommate horror stories, I have ’em), back in the town I had just left two years prior. I transferred locations with my company at my crappy retail job, and searched for a job in my field. For nine months.
That’s right, I could’ve carried a baby to term in the time it took me to find a job in my field after graduating college. I was back where I started with less friends, less money, worse mental health, way more bills, and just a piece of paper to show for it. Ugh.
But finally! The job came, and it was a decent one. Pay sucked, work sucked, but at least my coworkers and benefits were great, and I had a lot to learn. They even offered a tuition benefit. So, you guessed it, I went to grad school.
And then we had a whole pandemic. My opportunity to immerse myself in my work, hone my craft, network at my organization, make connections in grad school, and kick-start my career was, well, dull. Zoom meetings and online school was not exactly riveting, frankly.
But at long last, I graduated again, in December of 2022. And again, I was in the same place I’d been, plus some exhausting failed job interviews to boot. It took me six months of searching to get the amazing job I have now, and a huge journey full of a million ups and downs to live the life I’m living today. And honestly, I wouldn’t change a thing.
In the end, your post-graduation journey will look different from everyone else’s, but that’s what makes it special. Embrace the challenges and celebrate the victories, as they are all part of your unique story. Share your journey in the comments, and I’ll be cheering you on!
-w.w.
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